extremes

the week before last week was a real hell week for me. you see, i don't get bad days. i get really bad weeks. and that week proved its worth. unbelievably, you'll realize that the things you have always believed in may not be true after all. and the people you trust with everything that you have can still betray you. nothing seems to be sacred in this world, after all. i never thought i would have to go through doubting something i thought was unquestionable. i have trust issues. i admit that. i don't trust easily. but when i do, i can't seem to help but trust a person completely. i'll take your word for it, and it won't even matter if eveyone else says otherwise. it's kind of ironic to realize that the person you thought knew that best about you would go out of her way to lie to you. and not just the small white lies. that i can let go. but the fabricated stories kind. the kind that would make a person really believe in it. the kind you actually plan to lie about. the funny thing about is it, i understand the reason why she lied. but i can't seem to figure out why she would lie to me. i'm not trying to be pompous here. it's just that i would have understood her reasons far better than i would have understood her lying. what's even funnier is she never tried to explain why. or said sorry. she only says she knows and she understands. which makes it a bigger shit than it appears to. i don't want to get angry. but i don't think i can still trust much after this.

the week that came after that kind of compensated the previous week. mainly because i got promoted. i was extremely nervous throughout the process. i never really dared to imagine that i could get the job. apparently, i'm someone they're looking for. my friends were telling me it was probably meant for me. because i didn't really intend to apply for that post. but i was asked to revise my application, who would i have thought i'd get in? the euphoria is kind of taking a while to simmer. i was so ecstatic the day i found out that i hugged nearly everyone. some i didn't even know. which, as you'll probably know, is extremely out of character for me. but then, i never thought i'd be a girl who saw the silver lining instead of the cloud. i guess change really just happens and you don't even notice it happening.

regardless if it's about trust or promotions.